


the batkids just pop in on kyle rayner

by JadedJewels



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Batman: Under the Red Hood (2010)
Genre: Family Relationships - Freeform, Fluff, M/M, Shovel Talk, The Batfam Way, if ur a batcester i literally hate u do not interact, the window being used as a plot device
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:34:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26025049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JadedJewels/pseuds/JadedJewels
Summary: Kyle lives in New York. Well, when he’s not living on Oa. He’s also kinda sorta dating Jason Todd and the batkids want to see what he’s all about. Kyle just thinks he’s lucky Batman himself hasn’t climbed through his window.
Relationships: Batfamily - Relationship, Batfamily Members & Jason Todd, Kyle Rayner/Jason Todd
Comments: 12
Kudos: 356





	the batkids just pop in on kyle rayner

It felt strange to be in love again. Or well, it wasn’t quite love yet. But it was more than a crush, that was for sure. It was the start of what would be love if given the chance.

Anyway. It felt strange. Kyle was… he was a hopeless romantic. He had crushes like trees had leaves, that was hardly strange. But to feel more-than-a-crush-but-not-yet-love  _ was _ . Especially since he wasn’t so sure he deserved it.

Jason Todd was a fragile man. He wasn’t broken now, but he had been before, and he had painstakingly put together the jagged pieces to form something even more beautiful. Kyle hadn’t told Jason this yet, not in as many words. He would eventually but he wasn’t yet sure that Jason wouldn’t run from him when he said it, so he was holding off.

But as hard and tough and powerful Jason Todd was, he was also fragile. And Kyle didn’t quite believe he should be allowed to love anyone and have them love him back, let alone someone as stunning and breakable as Jason Todd.

Then again, Jason had confessed something similar to Kyle when their teasing and their taunting and broken down into something more tense and had evolved into something more bittersweet.

It had been nothing but sweet when Jason had kissed him though, nothing but pure delight when both of them had said  _ ah, fuck it _ , and decided what they had and what they could have was more important than anything else.

When Jason kissed him goodbye on a rooftop in Paris, after their vacation had been cut short and Kyle was needed back in space, it had been just as sweet as the first time.

Guy stared at him. “Dude…” he said, his voice pitched low. “You’re crazy.”

Kyle sighed and tipped his chair back. “You have to stop saying that.”

Hal kicked his chair and brought Kyle back down with a  _ thud _ . Kyle scowled at him, but Hal just stared at him imploringly. “We keep saying it because you  _ are _ . You can’t just date a  _ batkid _ .”

Jessica rolled her eyes. “If anything I’ve heard about Nightwing is true, what you just said  _ isn’t _ .”

Hal waved his hands wildly. “But that’s exactly what I mean!” he said, loudly. “I’ve heard Oliver who heard from Barry who heard from Wally that dating in that  _ clan _ is a terrible idea!”

Simon snorted, loudly, over his cup of hot chocolate. All the Earth Green Lanterns, plus Kyle, were crowded in at a table in Warriors, Guy dutifully ignoring all the problems in his bar as he stared at Kyle just as intently as Hal.

“You’re just jealous that Batman likes Kyle better than you,” Jessica said primly. 

Hal stabbed a finger in her direction. “You take that back!” he said, voice rising on every word. “As if I’d ever care what that freaky loner asshole would think -- but that’s why Kyle shouldn’t date one of them. They’re all freaky assholes!”

Guy elbowed Hal. “No they’re not,” he said. “Well, I mean, they’re all pretty freaky… most of ‘em were raised by Batman, right?”

All heads turned to Kyle, which made absolutely no sense, since he was sure Guy, Hal, and John all knew Bruce Wayne far better than he did. “Um,” Kyle said. “I think so? I mean there’s a lot of them, and I don’t know all of them that well --”

Guy nodded firmly, like Kyle’s word was gospel. Strange, considering how they had taken his dating decisions, Kyle thought grumpily.

“Well, you can’t be raised by a guy like Batman and not be freaky, so that makes sense,” Guy said, in the intonation of a college lecturer. 

Hal was watching Guy raptly, which was not quite a surprise, but Kyle felt a slight flare of annoyance when he noticed Simon watching Guy closely too. At least he had Jessica, who still looked exasperated, on his side. And John was still silently sipping his tea. Kyle couldn’t help but feel nervous when he glanced, again, at the older man. Whatever side John took would surely win. It almost always did.

“But,” Guy continued, and now he looked straight at Kyle. “Jason Todd… I don’t know man, why’d you have to pick him? He’s a whole basket of crazy.”

And now Kyle’s annoyance turned to full anger and he shoved himself out of his chair so hard it clattered to the ground. It was probably for the best that the angry words bubbling on the tip of his tongue never were spoken.

“Guy,” John said, loudly. His stern voice made Kyle freeze. He was almost as good as Batman about that. “Don’t let Batman hear you say that about his son.”

As Guy’s face drained of all color, John turned to Kyle. “I remember Jason Todd,” John said. “He was a good kid. I hope you two are happy.”

A soft warmth replaced the raging anger in Kyle’s chest and he couldn’t help but smile dumbly at John.

“Uh,” he said. “It’s pretty new. But, yeah. I mean, we are.”

***

Guy had apologized to Kyle the next day, but it didn’t quite sate the irritation Kyle still felt as they flew through space several days later, heading back home. If Guy had noticed Kyle was being quieter than usual, he didn’t mention it, which was probably for the best. Either way, Kyle couldn’t help but breathe a slight sigh of relief as they hovered above Kyle’s New York apartment, the one he always stayed at when he was away from Oa.

Guy continued to chatter as they ridded themselves of their uniforms with a thought and paraded through the lobby and up the elevator. It was only when Kyle swung open the door to his apartment that he came to an abrupt -- and stunned -- stop.

For a second it was silent as Kyle tried to regain the ability to even breathe, let alone move. The corner of Tim Drake-Wayne’s mouth twitched up in a smirk from where he sat perched on one of Kyle’s bar stools. “Tell them not to worry about the delay,” Tim said into the phone he was holding to his ear. “Just make sure it’s done by Friday. What can I say? I’m in a good mood.”

Tim had barely hung up the phone and put it on the island when Guy opened his big mouth. “I’m sorry about what I said about Jason!” he blurted out.

Tim blinked once and then went still. “What did you say about Jason,” he asked, slowly.

Thankfully, Kyle managed to regain his power of speech before he was witness to a homicide in his home. “Guy was just leaving,” he said, stumbling over his words as he shoved a very pale Guy out of the door they had just come in, and shut it firmly behind him.

When he turned back, the bird sitting at his island looked torn between amusement and annoyance. In the end, Tim just pointed a finger at Kyle and said, “good move. Very smart.”

“Uh, thanks,” Kyle said. “What… I mean, not that you’re not welcome here, but what are you doing here?”

“Just wanted to check you out,” Tim said. “See what Jason’s been so worked up about.”

Kyle edged forward hesitantly to take a seat at his own island. “He, uh, told you? And he’s worked up?”

Tim tilted his chin up and rolled his eyes. “Of course he told me,” he said. “We chat all the time.”

Now, if Kyle was honest, Tim was too good of a liar for him to actually call bullshit on that (mentally. He wouldn’t out loud no matter what) but Kyle had heard Jason complain about his brothers enough that he was fairly sure it wasn’t the whole truth. Jason  _ might _ have told Tim (and didn’t that make Kyle feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside) but there was no way they “chatted all the time.”

Despite his best efforts, some of his skepticism must have shown on his face, because Tim’s smile grew larger. “Don’t look at me like that, glo-stick,” Tim said. “This is me being nice, you know.”

On the one hand, Tim had broken into his apartment. On the other hand… well, he was a bat. Kyle settled on a strangled “ _ mhm _ .”

“I just wanted to see what you were all about, Rayner,” Tim said as he hopped off the barstool.

“We’ve worked with each other for years,” Kyle said faintly.

Tim just ignored him as he sprung over the back of Kyle’s couch with ease. “I’ll keep playing nice too as long as you keep treating Jason nice. You should give him a call too, when I’m gone.” By now, Tim was standing with one hand already pushing open the window. “Some shit went down. He’d probably appreciate a check in from someone who’s not in the family.”

Kyle tensed immediately, the hand his ring was on curling into a fist. “What? What happened?”

“Just give him a call,” Tim said, with half his body hanging out Kyle’s window. “Oh, and I upgraded your security for you. It was atrocious before.” And then the little bird was gone.

***

It wasn’t twenty minutes later that Kyle was circling over Gotham, trying to best estimate where Jason would be holed up at the moment. Despite his great focus in Crime Alley and the Bowrey, and the Narrows for his crime fighting activities, Jason had safehouses and apartments scattered all over the city, some varying from almost ridiculously opulent in the Diamond District to little more than elevated hovels in the East End.

Before Kyle had left for space, Jason had laid out a map with all of his properties circled in red ink. Kyle had only managed to remember a small number of them (after a lovely, emotionally charged makeout as Kyle realized how much trust Jason was placing with them), as Jason truly had an overwhelming amount and Kyle was not that familiar with Gotham.

Kyle spent above five minutes running through the houses he had managed to memorize before giving up. He was itching to get to Jason and this wasn’t making it go any faster. Alighting on a decrepit Gotham roof, Kyle let his white aura disperse as he pulled his phone out of his jean’s pocket.

Along with far too many houses, Jason also had far too many phone numbers, and he’d had fun entering all of the ones he wasn’t very likely to ditch under various silly white girl names. Kyle scrolled down to “Kaiyleene” with three hearts and a peach emoji and let it ring two, four, six times.

Jason picked up on the seventh ring, “if this is one of the Bat brood, whichever one you are, you’ve made an enemy --”

“Jay,” Kyle said, unable to help the relief he felt seeping into his bones at the sound of his voice. There was know way Tim would have just dipped out his window if Jason was… well. More seriously injured, that Kyle knew. But still, he couldn’t help the worry. The job was too dangerous to not have it.

There was a moments silence before Jason spoke again. Kyle could almost see the faint head tilt of surprise. “Kyle? I -- I thought you were still in space.”

“Just got back,” Kyle said. “Want to tell me which safehouse you’re in?”

“Why, you’re really gonna come down to see little ol’ me,” Jason asked, a smile twisting in his voice. “I’m in the Coventry on Colonel Route.”

Luckily, that was one of the houses that Kyle had actually memorized, and he was there within seconds, through the window. The security was already disabled and Jason didn’t even hold him at gunpoint when he floated in, which Kyle thought was a huge improvement. 

Instead Kyle fluttered over before Jason, spotting his wrapped ribs and a blooming bruise on his shoulder, but a bit of relief cooling his fierce worry at the lack of anything worse. 

“ _ Jay _ ,” Kyle said, an ach in his throat. 

Jason brushed a hand over his shoulder and then his chin. “Jeez Kyle,” he said. “You look like someone shot your dog. I’m fine.”

Kyle was getting better at reading Jason, and he could see the lines on his face and the bruises under his eyes. “For the last time, I’m a cat person,” he said. “And you’re a liar.”

Jason rolled his eyes and flopped down on his couch, tugging Kyle’s hand, but not pulling him down with him. Kyle sat immediately, curling up into Jason’s side. “So, are you saying when I get a dog you won’t love it?”

Kyle pressed his face into Jason’s unbruised shoulder and smiled. “No, of course I’ll love our dog. But I want a cat too.”

Jason huffed a laugh. “We can get a cat,” he said. “If Selina doesn’t have a litter when we’re ready, I’m sure she’ll be able to point us to a good breeder or rescue.”

“That’s good,” Kyle said. “Now, tell me what happened.”

He heard Jason sigh. “It’s nothing, glitter-glow. Just a case that brought back some memories.”

Kyle’s stomach lurched and he pressed a kiss to Jason’s shoulder, then his neck, and his chin, pulling Jason’s head over and down so he was looking Kyle in the eye. “Are you really okay?”

Jason’s lips brushed Kyle’s forehead. “Don’t worry so much,” he said, softly. “It was a rough night, but I’ll be fine. Really.”

If Jason really wanted to lie and fool him, Kyle knew he’d have no chance of knowing. Still, relationships were all about trust and Jason had done an absolute touching job of giving Kyle his trust so far. There’s no way Kyle wasn’t giving it back.

Kyle slid down to rest his chin on Jason’s shoulder. “Okay. Was Tim there? Is he okay?”

He felt Jason shift. “Tim?”

“He, ah, came by my place.”

He could hear the rolling eyes in Jason’s response, “let me guess… he didn’t exactly knock?”

Kyle poked him gently in the thigh. “It’s not like you do either,” he said.

“Yeah, but we’re dating,  _ Kyle _ ,” Jason said, doing his best to sound surly. 

Kyle laughed. “Yeah, yeah,” he said. “He was just worried about you. I think.”

“That’s what phones are for,” Jason grumbled. 

“Aw, don’t be grumpy,” Kyle said. “If he hadn’t come, I wouldn’t have been here tonight, and i would be able to make dinner for you.”

Kyle planted a kiss on Jason’s lips as he pushed himself off the couch. Jason made a pleased  _ humming  _ noise before Kyle’s words caught up to him and he pulled himself up as well.

“Oh, no way Rayner!” Jason shouted after him, as Kyle half jogged to the kitchen. If Jason’s ribs weren’t hurt and he didn’t have what Kyle knew was instinctual fear of Alfred, Kyle was sure Jason would have tackled him to the ground. “You are not cooking, I already had a bad night. Why do you want to burn my house down too?”

Kyle ducked behind the small island in Jason’s kitchen, planting his hands so he was ready to bollt either way if Jason tried to grab him. In a pure physical contest, Jason would win everytime, but he was literally fighting wounded and Kyle was not above taking advantage. 

Jason had, of course, chased him all the way into the kitchen and was hovering by the doorway, eyes darting around nervously like he was afraid Kyle would break something just by being in his precious kitchen. 

“C’mon Jay,” Kyle said, putting on his best puppy dog eyes and pleading voice. “I just want to do something nice for my boyfriend.”

Pink stained Jason’s cheeks as his eyes darted to the ground and he shifted shyly. Happiness bubbled up in Kyle’s chest and a fond smile stretched across his face. Jason had the sweetest reactions, really.

After a couple of seconds, Jason shook his head and raised his gaze to mock glare at Kyle. “Don’t even try me,” he said. “I thought we’d talked about this; no kitchen for you. I can make something.”

“No way,” Kyle said immediately. “You’re hurt. The fact I’m even allowing you in the kitchen is evidence of my kindness.”

Jason rolled his eyes. “Don’t be ridi--”

“I’ll call Alfred,” Kyle said. Jason’s jaw snapped shut.

“I never gave you Alfie’s number,” he said, suddenly wary.

Kyle puffed his chest out. “Tim somehow got his number in my phone,” he said, like a liar. “I’ll call him and he’ll call Alfred.”

It was, after all, a lie, but even if Jason could tell, Kyle was pretty sure he wouldn’t chance it, not when Alfred was involved. If he did call Kyle’s bluff, Kyle would call Hal, who would call Oliver, who would call Dinah, who would call Barbara, and then Kyle would have Alfred’s phone number. It would be worth it. 

Jason narrowed his eyes further, but like Kyle thought, he just heaved a massive sigh. “Fine, I won’t cook,” he said. “But neither are you! Fucking order something, the menus are in the drawer.”

Kyle, who had been planning this all along, grinned and snapped open the drawer. “Now go sit back on the couch,” he said, pawing through the menus. “You’re getting babied tonight, Todd.”

Jason threw his hands up in the air but slumped back over to the couch, leaving Kyle to pull out his phone and wonder if there was a safe way to give someone with hurt ribs a back massage. 

***

Kyle was on a bit of a vacation. Or, really, a long weekend. Just three extra days where he got to laze around and do absolutely nothing. It was wonderful. He was already planning to fly by his mom’s place in LA, and spend two of the days there. With his third, he wasn’t sure what he should do. He could spend it with some of his friends that he hadn’t seen in a while, or maybe become a shut in for the day and do all the drawing he didn’t have time to do. Making constructs was awesome, but they faded, and Kyle loved the permanence of putting pen to paper. 

Or… well, Kyle knew Jason was on a case at the moment. He was deep into whatever he was doing and a lot of that involved tracking the people he was after. {Still, Kyle did kind of want to see him while he had time on Earth, but he wasn’t sure if Jason would welcome him as he did his sneaky detective work.} Bruce had really helped his combat skills when Kyle was training with him, but the whole detective and stealth things he had never really gotten a handle on.

It still made Kyle wonder if he should give Jason a call and see what his  _ boyfriend _ said. On the other hand, he wasn’t sure if Jason was so involved with his case that he might not even welcome that much, if he picked up at all.

Kyle mused carefully on this as he drew a previously frozen pizza out of the oven, and then he heard a floorboard creak. He clenched his fist, his ring flying onto his finger as he spun around and pointed --

Right at a tiny kid wearing red and green, and a small woman wearing all black. Black Bat and Robin. Kyle’s jaw fell open.

Robin -- Damian Wayne -- sniffed and tilted his head up. “His reaction time is just barely adequate, but his senses are awful. How long did it take him to realize we were here, Cain?”

“7,” Black Bat, aka Cassandra Cain said.

Robin huffed. “Preposterous,” he said. “We were not even making an attempt to keep ourselves hidden! It is absolutely shameful.”

“I --  _ what _ ?” Kyle said, like a genius.

“Not quick with his mind either,” Robin said.

“Nicer,” Black Bat said, tilting her heavily masked head to look down at Robin.

Robin made a noise like a balloon deflating, “ _ I am being nice, _ ” he said. “If I was being rude, I would have attacked this buffoon after the second minute.”

Kyle opened his mouth, planning to take the Hal approach and just say whatever came to mind first (what  _ else _ do you do in this situation?) when the fire alarm went off. As he swore and ripped open the oven to paw out the remains of his pizza, he figured that might have been for the best.

As Kyle finished swatting at the smokey air and dumping his pizza in the trash, he turned to see Black Bat helpfully opening a window; the last window closed in his living room. Robin, on the other hand, was simply swatting his cape out of his face with an even more disapproving look.

“He cannot even cook,” Robin said, in what Kyle was pretty sure was supposed to be a whisper, but was actually far too loud. “And his home…”

Black Bat made a shushing noise and finally Kyle regained the ability to speak in anything but fragments and cuss words.

“Wait, hold on,” he said, his voice several pitches higher than he wanted it to be. “What are you two even doing here?”

Robin puffed out his chest. “I had a case in New York,” he said. “And while I was here, I thought I would come and see the person that we are welcoming into the family Father insists on claiming we have. Since it is Todd, I should have expected someone like you, of --”

“No case,” Black Bat said. “Wanted to see.”

Kyle choked out a strangled laugh as Robin’s face twisted in fury and he hissed “ _ Cain _ !” at Black Bat.

“Great,” Kyle said, trying not to sound too sarcastic. “I’m… great, this is awesome. So, uh, how many of you are going to pop by?”

Black Bat tilted her head. “Many?” she asked.

Robin narrowed his eyes. “One of the others must have already been here. No wonder the security is nearly passable instead of what the others of Father’s associates use. I suspect Drake.”

“Uh, yeah,” Kyle said. “Did… did Tim not tell you?”

Robin snorted, loudly. “As if I would ever do anything on  _ Drake’s _ word alone,” he said.

Kyle stared down at him. “Kid, you need to chill,” he said and ignored the noise Robin made. “Also, uh… you know I’m not actually part of your family, right? Not that I don’t really like Jason, or anything, but it’s really soon for all… that.”

Apparently this caught the kid’s attention. “So you intend to issue a slight against our family?” he asked, fury in his voice. “Todd may be a failure, but he is worth many of you! Just look at where you are --”

Black Bat patted the top of Robin’s head and he stopped mid sentence to glare up at her. “Nervous,” she said. “Cares. Love, soon.”

Kyle felt his face go hot, but the kid seemed to deflate. “Fine,” he spat, his tone gentler than it had been the entire rest of the visit. “Even if his living conditions are atrocious, his artwork is adequate, so at least he is exhibiting some worth.”

Kyle blinked. “Also, I save the universe and stuff,” he said.

“You’re a Lantern,” Robin said dismissively, halfway to the window already. “It hardly counts.” Then the kid was gone.

***

The day after, Kyle had sent out an SOS to Jason regarding his sadly empty cabinets and Jason had turned up at the front door (for once) with bags of fresh groceries and a recipe tucked in that beautiful brain of his. Kyle kissed his forehead and then his lips and told him he was a genius.

Jason had gone slightly red and stomped over to Kyle’s kitchen. Once he had gotten the oven preheated and various delicious smelling things going on the stove and inside of it, he opened Kyle’s trash can to examine the wreckage. 

“So,” Jason said. “Even I didn’t think you’d be able to mess up  _ frozen pizza _ so badly. Seriously, even Dick and Replacement can handle it. Usually.”

“Well actually,” Kyle said. “This is because of your family, you know. Your sister and littlest brother showed up in my living room.”

Jason’s gaze cut up to Kyle’s face, as if trying to see if Kyle was messing with him. When he saw honly honesty, he groaned. Loudly.

“I’ll freaking shoot Demon Spawn when I see him next. Again,” Jason said, pulling one of his phones out of his pockets. “Replacement too, because I’m sure this is all his fault.”

“They didn’t know he’d been to see me,” Kyle said. “Also, please don’t shoot your batfamily. I’m sure Batman would find a way to blame me for it.”

“Don’t be so sure,” Jason said. “I know you’re a Lantern, but he really does like to blame me for stuff too. Also, don’t call them my bat family.”

Kyle shrugged and Jason sighed, resting his phone on his head. Then he pocketed it again and walked over to cup Kyle’s heads in his hands. “Batbrat didn’t ambush you and try to fight you to the death, did he?” he asked.

Kyle, well aware of how Jason’s first meeting with Damian Wayne had gone, smiled slightly and shook his head as well as he could. “Nah,” he said. “Black Bat wouldn’t have let him anyway.”

Jason nodded slightly. “Yeah, Cass is way better than that,” he admitted. “But what did they want?”

Kyle’s smile grew. “Well I think they wanted to give me a shovel talk for their big bro.”

Jason groaned and dropped his head onto Kyle’s shoulder. “I fucking hate that family,” he said.

“No you don’t,” Kyle said, running a hand through his hair. 

Jason did his best to burrow deeper into Kyle’s shoulder and so his response of “ _ shut up! You don’t know me! _ ” was muffled.

Kyle laughed and pressed a kiss to his temple. “You better make sure our food doesn’t burn.”

Jason raised his head to kiss his jaw and his lips again before pulling away and heading back to the kitchen, but only to stir something on the stovetop. “Like I’d ever let that happen,” he tossed over his shoulder.

“You’re so sexy when you’re being all chef-y Jase!” Kyle called, louder than necessary, just to see the back of Jason’s neck turn red.

***

It was good, Kyle decided, that he had pretty much surpassed all real shock at finding variously color coded Gotham vigilantes in his apartment. It was also good, he thought, looking down at his paint-stained sweats and his baggy henley with several holes, that it was just slightly too cold to have been walking around naked. 

Instead he just glared bleary-eyed at Batgirl and Signal, both unmasked, as he slouched over to his kitchen to get a glass of water. “Too early,” Kyle said, hoarsley. His stay on Earth this time was little more than a pitstop and, well, if you got the urge to draw at 2am  _ you fucking draw at 2am _ .

Signal looked at him like he was an idiot. “It’s 1:30 in the afternoon,” he said.

Kyle could only grumble something intelligible as he reached for his instant coffee, but Batgirl stretched and gave an over exaggerated yawn. “Dunno, Duke,” she said brightly. “I think the man has a point.”

Duke shot her an incredulous look. “You’re  _ nocturnal _ .”

Batgirl -- Stephanie Brown -- simply shrugged and pushed forward a white to-go box. “We brought waffles,” she said and that was enough to draw Kyle’s attention off the coffee he was fumbling with.

“Peace offering accepted,” Kyle said, pulling a fork out of one of his drawers. 

Stephanie grinned widely at him, “Thought we might need it,” she said, gesturing between herself and Duke. “We’re not as scary as Tim, Cass, or Damian.”

Duke sighed and rested his elbows on Kyle’s island, pulling a to-go box closer to him. “Kid’s bark is worse than his bite.”

Kyle raised his eyebrows and Stephanie looked sympathetic. “He’s right, you know,” she said, before stuffing another waffle into her mouth. 

Kyle definitely didn’t believe that, but he cleared his throat of thick delicious waffles and syrup. “So… how can I help you?” He hoped he didn’t actually sound as awkward as he thought he sounded.

So maybe he wasn’t as used to the Bats and Birds popping in on him as he thought. At least, not when they sat down with him for breakfast instead of doing their usual spooky thing. 

Judging by Duke’s faintly amused grin, Kyle hadn’t exactly been  _ smooth _ , but it was Stephanie who answered. “Oh, I wanted to see the guy Jason’s dating who managed to bag the varying approval of Tim, Cass,  _ and _ Damian for myself. You seriously don’t know how impressive that is.”

Kyle blinked. “Really?” he asked, unable to help a bit of pride from those words.

Duke snorted. “Oh yeah,” he said. “I mean, I haven’t dated anyone since I got adopted, but the stories I’ve heard… horror show, man.”

Stephanie grinned like a shark. “You have  _ no _ idea.”

There was a beat of silence that lasted just long enough for Kyle to feel a touch uncomfortable, then Stephanie broke it. Kyle was pretty sure it was deliberate, but he tried to focus on what she was saying.

“We poked around your place before you got up,” she said without a hint of shame.

“ _ You _ poked around,” Duke said, immediately. Apparently he wasn’t quite as down with breaking and entering as the other Bats’ yet.

Stephanie waved an arm. “Whatever, he’s used to us,” she said. “You’ve got some cool stuff in here. How much of it is space stuff?”

Kyle shrugged. “Some,” he said. “The Guardians don’t let us take too much to our planetary homes, mostly because they like to keep an eye on it. I have a lot more, uh, space stuff, in my room on Oa.”

“Cool!” Stephanie said, leaning forward. “Have you taken Jason to Oa yet?”

The mere thought of Jason on Oa made Kyle snort so hard he almost choked on his waffles. “Uh, no,” he said, after a brief coughing fit and Stephanie pounding on his back. “I don’t think Jason would like Oa very much.”

Stephanie pouted. “But you’ve at least taken him on a romantic space vacation, right?”

“It’s, uh, in the works,” Kyle said. Really, it hadn’t been until just then, because it was one of the best ideas he’d ever heard. 

Duke sighed again. “Steph,” he said, sounding a little strained. “It’s bad enough you had to drag me here, do we have to ask him about their dating plans too? Jason’s already gonna kill us for just being here.”

“He did say he was going to shoot Damian last time,” Kyle said, trying his best to look helpful.

“Oh hush,” Stephanie said to him, ruffling her cape, before she turned to Duke. “Honestly,” she told him. “I know you’re not quite used to the level of craziness this family operates at yet, but this is a good experience for you. Trust me, you’ll want to get used to it.”

Stephanie cocked her head thoughtfully. “Although,” she said. “I haven’t been adopted, so I’m not really part of the family. Just a close family friend.”

Kyle frowned. “Really?” he asked. “Because basically said you were.”

Stephanie grinned at him and nodded. “Nice to know the black sheep thinks so highly of me,” she said. “But nah. I’m touched, but that’d make being exes with Tim, like,  _ super _ weird.”

“Yeah, that,” Duke said, looking fairly mutinous. “Also because then you wouldn’t be able to put the moves on Cass, even though you’ve been talking about it for  _ months _ .”

Stephanie chucked her fork at Duke’s head. “That was supposed to be confidential!” she yelled. 

Duke ducked out of the way of the fork, but Stephanie caught hold of his collar and started dragging him to the window. Her rant about secrets was so loud and still gaining steam as she all but shoved Duke out the window that Kyle’s following laughter could barely be heard. 

***

It was the next day when Kyle got a phone call from Jason.

“So,” he said in his  _ I’m sitting in a plush chair and twirling a knife _ voice. Kyle’s breath caught. It was a very nice voice, after all. “A little yellow birdy told me he and a certain purple bird went to see you.”

“Oh, don’t be mad,” Kyle said, stretching out on his couch. “They brought me waffles.”

Jason sighed. “Of course they did.”

“You know,” Kyle said. “That Duke’s terrible at keeping secrets. He dropped a pretty big bombshell while he was here.”

“Really?” Jason asked. “He’s usually smart enough to keep his nose out of this family’s nonsense.”

“Oh, so unlike you?” Kyle said, and then waited for Jason to stop grumbling. “But no, really. Stephanie dragged him along and was poking fun, so he made a very calculated reveal of her feelings for Black Bat.”

Abruptly, the line went silent. It sounded like Jason wasn’t even breathing.

“... Jason?” Kyle asked, concerned despite himself.

As an answer, Jason simply broke out in cackling laughter. “Holy shit! Now, that is just  _ too _ good. Does Cass know? Does  _ Tim _ ? Damn, Steph is really thotting her way around the family. Respect.”

“Shit,” Kyle said, flatly. “I knew I shouldn’t have told you. You’re not going to let this go, are you?”

He could hear Jason’s smirk through the phone. “First of all, Rayner, you  _ have _ to tell me this shit. We’re dating, so no keeping secrets, okay?” And Kyle’s chest warmed, so naturally Jason had to ruin it not even a second later. “ _ Second _ of all, there’s no way in hell I’m letting this go! After all the shit they put us through? You nearly burnt down your apartment!”

“That’s an exaggeration,” Kyle said, but Jason just spoke over him.

“It’s time for some revenge.”

Kyle sighed. “You can do what you want, but I’m not getting involved.”

“ _ Revenge _ , Kyle.”

Kyle placed his head in his hands and said, “fine. What do you have in mind.”

***

The next visitor is two days after Kyle’s reluctant vengeance planning with Jason. Kyle, at the demand of Jason, had stopped trying to cook for himself unless Jason was there to guide him. Jason said he would teach Kyle how to cook eventually, but until then he was regulated to certain takeout places that Jason had selected.

Kyle would protest more, but he did get a stipend from his work with the Guardians that he’d begun transferring into various Earth curranies after he had started dating Jason and had a bigger need for Earth money again. Also, while he protested his skills as a chef to Jason at any chance he got, he was well aware he was far from the best, and he would actually like to eat something that wasn’t faintly burnt when Jason wasn’t around to cook for him.

So as Kyle was sorting through Jason’s selected takeout options, with the very Jason-like range of extremely high class to your delicious but hole in the wall-y restaurants there was a knock at his door.

And honestly, when he opened his door and Dick Grayson tumbled through, exclaiming about the traffic and how Kyle better like Indian food, the only motigem of surprise Kyle could muster was that he had used the door.

Still, there was a flicker of nervousness in Kyle’s gut when he sat down at his island after telling Dick that he did, in fact, like Indian food. Dick just smiled and made small talk as they began their meal, but Dick was Jason’s only older sibling. And yeah, Kyle knew he was closer with Tim, and he knew that of all of them, Damian was the one most likely to try to stab him, and Cassandra was the most dangerous of all, but there was just something about older siblings that made him a bit more nervous.

Well. At least he wasn’t facing down the Bat himself. Now, that made his gut flip and do the flamenco. 

“ _ Wow _ ,” Dick said, almost moaning around a mouthful of food. “This is alarmingly good, don’t you think?” Kyle nodded. “It came at Jay’s recommendation.” Dick leveled Kyle with a knowing look as Kyle tensed just slightly.

“Look,” Dick said, putting down his fork. “I’d threaten you with a broken nose if you hurt Jason, but I think you probably got the message from the rest of the family.”

Kyle managed a smile. “Yeah,” he said. “You guys are a scary bunch.”

Dick grinned. “We try,” he said. “But, really, I just wanted to come by and talk about Jason. Really talk, and try not to judge you.” He tapped his fingers in a little dance across the table. “Jason means a lot to me. To us. We’ve gone through hell and back to get him in a good place with the family; he’s gone through hell and back too. We just want him safe. And happy.”

Kyle nodded, and his heart clenched as he remembered some of the things Jason had told him. “I know,” he said, suddenly desperate that Dick understood him. “I know, I really do. I don’t want anything but that for him either.”

Dick leaned forward just slightly and locked eyes with Kyle, eyes brighter and bluer than Jason’s. He looked like he was trying to peer into Kyle’s soul and Kyle did his best to let him.

Then Dick leaned back again and grinned, broader than ever. “Good,” he said. “That’s all I wanted to hear.”

Kyle sighed in relief, not noticing how tense he had gotten until he relaxed again. Dick laughed as Kyle slouched slightly and rolled out his shoulders.

“So,” Kyle said, picking up his fork again. “Can I expect anyone else to pop in? Like, uh, the big guy?”

Dick tilted his head thoughtfully. “Well,” he said. “Damian let it slip to me everybody was coming over, and if he accidentally told me, there’s no  _ way _ he got it past Bruce. And Barbara kinda just knows everything.”

Kyle felt the blood drain from his face. “So,” he said, again. “I should be expecting more visits then?” He glanced around his living room.  _ Fuck _ he would have to clean before Batman showed up.

“Ah, no,” Dick said, sounding slightly contrite. “See, I could lie to you and tell you they haven’t been looking in on you for a while now, or just popping in when you aren’t home, but that isn’t a good way to start a family relationship.”

Then Dick booked it to the window and Kyle simply didn’t have the energy to stop him as he stared around his apartment with the sad, sad thought in his head that  _ fucking shitballs the Batman’s seen my dirty underwear when I leave it laying around _ .

The next thing Kyle knew, he was reaching for his phone and dialing one of Jason’s numbers. Kyle thanked God and every other deity in the multiverse that Jason picked up almost immediately, because he was pretty sure his brain matter was leaking out of his ears. 

Kyle did really hear Jason’s greeting, because the only thought in his mind came out of his mouth. “Jason,” he said, “did you know that Batman and Oracle have been spying on me in secret?”

There was a slightly too long silence. “Fuck,” Jason said. “I was hoping you wouldn’t find out about that. Sorry my family are such freaks. And that I didn’t tell you.”

And he did sound genuinely sorry and honestly, Kyle would have been pretty happy never knowing that in his entire life, so he meant when he said, “it’s… fine. Really.”

“Good,” Jason said, and Kyle dreaded the growing excitement in his voice. “Now, you’ve got to tell me: how did you find out? Is Bruce losing his touch? It can’t be Babs, she’d never, so please, Kyle, please tell me Bruce is losing his touch.”

And if Kyle responded to that by going over to his couch and collapsing on it with a long, exaggerated, drawn out sigh, well Jason deserved it, didn’t he?

**Author's Note:**

> this was so dumb :D leave a comment pls


End file.
